SKI FASHION

Who besides my mother wears her fur coat, cashmere leggings and kick ass boots to the top of Vail mountain and struts around? Claudia Schiffer does and I'll bet by the end of this trip that my mom (chatty sandy) and she will be BFFs. I didn't recognize her and I know I should since she is a model but I lost touch with her when she married that magician.

What ever happened to wearing jeans, a cute hat and sun glasses skiing? Now everyone is wearing unflattering boarder gear, goggles, and helmets you can ever find your own family on the hill. Last year we did Aspen which on the other hand was outrageously trendy (gaudy) and impractical - are you really skiing in that or just walking your stupid fucking dog everywhere (inside restaurants) dogs like small children should be not seen and not heard. Supposedly All of the famous people were there but You couldn't tell who was who due to all of the wannabes.

Looks that I am seeing on the slopes ( I'll try to get some pics)
Snow boarder dude - dreadlocks, no shower (for months) and a backpack with water in it
White coat girl - fur trimmed, pink lipstick, tight black pants- can't ski
Fatso sport guy - a football jersey over a coat - neat look bubba
The matchy matcherton - everything matches - go muffy go

Coming next

New year resolutions and why I am going to start drink beer

CROWD PLEASERS

I'm always looking for the easiest way to please a crowd.  In cooking I like to find the shortest recipe that will yeild the most compliments.  When a recipe starts with "in one bowl" I move along becuse that means there is going to be "another bowl" and that is way too complicated for someone with adult A.D.D.  So, I'm going to fess up with my seafood bisque recipe because so many have asked for it and its embarrassingly easy:

SUZY SHORTCUT'S seafood bisque

3 cups seafood (I use shrimp, scallops, and real crab)

1 can of each of the folllowing soups

    - cream of shrimp (can only find at the grand)

    - cream of potato 

    - cream of mushroom

    - tomato bisque

5 oz sherry- or more

1 qt half and half

1 small onion minced

pepper to taste

precook seafood until barely underdone (it will continue to cook in the soup) 

add the rest of the ingredients and cook until done

better if you make it a day or 2 ahead and keep in fridge

serves 10-12 - I always double the recipe

I also have some great crowd pleasers in my wardrobe. I am consistently stopped and asked about my...

FRYE BOOTS: 

Jane Tall in Taupe -best $400 ever spent - get them on Zappos

VINTAGE COIN NECKLACE:

I can sell them off of my neck in New York - sold exclusively at Gray

VINTAGE FUR VEST:

It's a long fur coat with no sleeves - got it at LuLu's at the Belle Cay in the city

MAN SIZED WATCH:

I started with the Michael Kors (5 of them) but now everyone is onto those so now I like my TW Steel

GUCCI BAG

Its the cutest small bag with a long gold chain stap - perfect for phone, lipgloss and cash. Bought by my hubbie in Vegas - he doesn't understand why Gucci is so expensive... whatever THANKS!

SO, look for some unique things that are special.  Vintage things are great - go through your Mom's old stuff (before your sisters do) and grab an old pin or necklace.  I know that being unique is scarry for many of you. You like to be the same as all of your friends so you shop at Cusp or Neiman Marcus or LuLu Lemon so that you can have the same things as all of your friends but don't be afraid people will still like you.

DON'T DO THIS

If you feel a little sad around the holidays - that is normal.  Lots of people feel sad around the holidays so they just drink alot forgetting that alcohol is a depressant so they feel worse so they drink more because of the "hair of the dog" trick (which really works - I found that out one Mother's day when I was under the impression that Mother's day meant get drunker than a MOTHER the night before the Sunday brunch and then try to not throw up at the country club.  Anyway - 3 Bloody Mary's later and this MOTHER felt GREAT again) 

I digress - back to feeling sad in the holidays... many of us have lost loved ones and the memories of these people crop up and we miss them more during the holidays.

So, if you are feeling a little sad DON'T take a bottle of red wine down to your basement and start going through old boxes of pictures and photo albumns because all you will do is spend the DAY down there crying like a baby and get even more behind on all the things you have to do.

2 BEST BUDS:

(My Dad -grandpa Nick- and my son Gray at age 2 - he's 16 now). Miss you Dad.

PARTY WHORES

These are the people who spend their holidays bouncing from party to party.  It is exhausting to be so popular.  If they get invited to 8 parties in one night - by god they will get to all 8.  I have determined that these people are so insecure that they can't possibly miss one.  Maybe they think that people will be talking behind their backs, maybe they want to feel "popular", or maybe they just don't have the social graces to accept one invite and decline the other ones because they already have plans.  But thats a big risk because what if the other parties were more fun????

If you are the first party, the PW's (party whores) will show up right on time (or annoyingly early) and remind you immediately thay can only stay a short time because they have to scoot off to another party because "its my husband's sister's neice's cousin and we really feel like we should be there - so sorry..."  They nervously jump around the party trying to get a word into every guest and letting them know their plight (a few other parties to hit).

If you are the last party, the PW's show up, you are bombed and they are a huge buzz kill. "sorry we're late... where should we put our coat... do you have any water... we brought you a little gift"  Listen assholes I don't know who you are right now - I forgot that you were even coming. SOOOO lets catch up over a coffee so that I can remember the interesting conversation about the other parties that you were at, what they had to eat, who all was there and what they wore but NOT NOW, and I was lip syncing to "don't stop believin'" so join on in and shut the fuck up.

Guess what...I'm tallking behind your back and so is every host of the 8 parties that you attended.  But hey, you are popular so... enjoy that and post a bunch of party pics on your facebook. 

Coming soon to Laura Says...
People who don't RSVP because they are just "not good" at that.  These are the same people who "don't do" thank you notes.  Ironically all of these people grew up in a trailer park.  Coincidence?

Its the THOUGHT that counts

Nothing is worse than getting a crappy gift.  Last year, my Mom gave my daughter a plastic cutting board shaped like a baby bird (check out line at TARGET)  she's 13 what would she use this for when she's making dinner for the family - HA!  No, my Mom is not senile she was just being lazy. 

I got a silver necklace from some unnamed person.  ANYONE who remotely knows me, knows I don't wear silver ever - its a thing for me.   So, on the Thank You note I wrote "thanks for the silver necklace.  As you know I don't wear silver so I returned it."  I also wanted to add "and Thanks for making me take time out of my busy day to go to the store to return the gift that you bought me knowing that I wouldn't like it" 

Here are some of my favorite gifts -I think that you can't really go wrong here:

Cosmetic Bags - you can't have enough and they do get old and yucky

Candles - Voluspa Maison Rouge - Golden Cypress - I have it going in my kitchen everyday

Make up - a pretty lip gloss (Dior has some great neutrals) or Armani black mascara (its amazing)\
Clutch - a neutral clutch is always useful
Wrap or Scarf - pick an interesting color to add to their collection
Coffee Table Book - the story of Gucci or Kelly Wearstler's  HUE is amazing

"Its that THOUGHT that counts" right?  So please do  GIVE IT SOME THOUGHT.